As always, listen to your gut

Ask first date online dating

Hint or specifically state that you can only be out until a certain time. Photo by Michel Filion In general, my rule is an invitation to meet should come by the third email you send. After a while, any of these cases is a waste of your time. If she expresses an interest in meeting you, give her the name of the mutually convenient coffee establishment and the address. By this point you have talked back and forth twice and can measure how well you are getting along.

Hint or specifically state

Secretly, you are hoping to discover the same about them. One common reason to delay a first date is due to an attempt to learn more about the other person. After the hour was over, I explained that I only extend the good dates and since ours was a great date asked if she would be up for miniature golf she was.

First Date Length Plan to keep the first date short. You can come up with a reason you can only be out for a set amount of time but most people will not press very hard to find out why.

If this happens to you, wait a few days continuing the email conversations and then ask again. This is not a very good reason. After all, contacting someone is just a pre-cursor to the first date. If you enjoy talking on the phone or prefer to do so before meeting someone, treat this step like you would the first date by asking for the phone number by the third email.

This approach is a cousin to the having-your-friend-call-you-and-faking-an-emergency act that some people think is so slick. Other times, people are just reluctant to meet you because they are still trying to decide if they like you. In contrast, many times the dates ended with coffee or lunch.

Photo by Michel